Young People Who Phone Calls Trust Their Loneliness Wellness Partner: CNN’s Look at Alexander Graham Bell and the Rise of the Internet and Other Social Networks

Editor’s Note: The views expressed in this commentary are solely those of the writers. CNN showcased the work of The Conversation, which is a collaboration between journalists and academics. The content is produced solely by The Conversation.

It is possible to help with loneliness by calling a friend or relative and it is also possible to regulate our nervous system through phone calls.

Alexander Graham Bell probably didn’t think about how his invention would change over time. Wireless and mobile are used to transmit written messages, photographs and access the internet just like a wired medium used for a voice conversation.

It is positive that phones allow young people to communicate with others more easily and quickly than before, even though the change in use of the telephone is positive.

Despite, how “connected” we are and how easy it might be to communicate, mental ill-health, including anxiety and depression, is on the increase among young adults. They were also one of the groups who felt most lonely as a result of the pandemic.

Source: https://www.cnn.com/2023/02/14/health/young-people-phone-calls-trust-loneliness-wellness-partner/index.html

Can you feel lonely? Finding the balance between living and sleeping with a real-time friend or family in the presence of a professional speaker

They could have chosen to use their phones for live calls. It could have. Particularly given that a live phone conversation can make us feel good and give us a sense of fulfillment, which continues after we’ve hung up.

The quality of the phone calls is important, but relationships with friends and family can help improve well-being.

40% of 16 to 24 year olds reported feeling lonely in the world’s largest loneliness study conducted by the British Broadcasting Corporation. This might seem like an alarming finding, but Cacioppo’s theory suggests that there may be a window of opportunity to alleviate loneliness and keep it at bay before it becomes harmful.

Dialogue in real time helps us clarify things by giving us the opportunity to ask questions and listen, as well as sharing knowledge and ideas with one another. It helps with problem-solving and reduces misunderstandings when you’re present with another person.

Many of us have experienced getting the tone of a text confused, which has caused us to fall into a tailspin. It is hard to figure out what someone is saying on a phone call. And if you do, it’s easy to ask for clarification.

The way in which the voice rises and falls gives us a clue as to what’s going on and helps us feel safe.

The chemistry of our body changes and this leads to increases in the hormones oxytocin and cortisol and decreases in the stress hormone cortisol.

The voice’s rhythm has a bigger effect on the sound than what is said. 42% of the communication is credited to vocal quality and 7% to the content when a person is talking on a phone call, according to Albert Mehrabian.

With video calls it can be great to see a friend or family member in their own environment. This may help you to feel more socially connected and it may be easier to see facial expressions and laughter.

You and your friend might like the element of surprise that comes from an impromptu call. However, if someone does not answer or cannot talk bear in mind that it’s just not the right time for them. They might be busy with family, shopping or eating dinner. If you want to avoid this, send a text asking the friend or family member if they are free to talk and if not set up a mutually convenient time later.

You’d love to talk and have a lot of crazy ideas on the phone. Or you may prefer in advance of the call to jot down a few ideas of what you would like to talk about. This will ensure that you are thinking about what to say and not forgetting about it.

If you want the focus to be less on the talk, but still make a social connection why not try something like a video call while simultaneously playing a video game with a friend or watching something. The talk will then be governed by the game or show and take away any pressure you might feel about what to talk about.

Talking on the phone: a personal conversation guide for navigating finances, careers, and well-being in the 21st century. An excerpt from CNN’s Adulthood, But Better newsletter

Editor’s Note: Sign up for CNN’s Adulthood, But Better newsletter series. Our seven-part guide has tips to help you make more informed decisions around finance, career, wellness and personal connections.

Some of my earliest memories from growing up in the late 1980s were of my mom spending hours on the phone with my grandmother, my aunt and her best friends.

There was a daily circuit of female communication that kicked off sometime right after breakfast. There were gossip fests and vent sessions, as well as frequent check-ins, between the Oprah and Phil Donahue television shows.

I’ve even started speaking with my author friends, a group of people who have long preferred email and text. I realized just how good it felt to hear their voices and to really know if they were emotional or happy or uncomfortable or even lonely.

The research supports my mom’s comforting voice. E-mail can be useful for scheduling meetings and sending spreadsheets, but a study found that using one’s voice is more suitable for connecting with others.

How often, when feeling poorly, even as adults, do we wish for Mom to take care of us? I still felt loved through our conversations despite the fact that physical contact was not possible.

It’s possible to find a sense of shared well-being through conversations that forge strong bonds. “When women feel socially connected and supported, they are not only better equipped to cope with challenges, pursue their goals, and enjoy a higher quality of life, but also to improve the lives of everyone they are connected with,” said Kristjan Archer, a senior communications consultant at Gallup, in a March 8 blog post.

I discovered many benefits of voice-to-voice contact, especially when it came to connecting with my parents and older relatives, most of whom were born in the 1960s or earlier.

Source: https://www.cnn.com/2023/03/28/health/talking-on-the-phone-wellness/index.html

Texting When You Need It: A Tipping Tip From a 12-Year-Old Parent Who Feels Nervous About Ordering at a Restaurant

Tone is lost in texting. How often do relationships suffer serious damage over a text miscommunication? A person attempting to be funny or sarcastic can send a message that does not convey their emotion, and suddenly Aunt Margaret’s side of the family is not going to attend your Thanksgiving celebration this year.

There are benefits to being in a wandering conversation. We didn’t have anything else to worry about, we had time. If you have the luxury of time, letting a conversation meander can be a beautiful thing. I learned so much about my parents, our family history, silly stories from my childhood and things that surprised me during our phone chats.

During one summer phone call, my father, a veteran of the Vietnam War who had never wanted to talk about his experience there, called to ask if I wanted to watch Ken Burns’ docuseries “The Vietnam War”. For the first time in my memory, my dad shared anecdotes from his time in the US Navy aboard the aircraft carrier where he spent the war.

I started saving up stories to share on our weekly calls and making notes of questions to ask later. I started to schedule more phone calls with my family and friends, which made it easier for me to see the speaker of the phone call.

I may be making the switch sound as if it was an easy transition, but I had phone anxiety and it took practice. I loved making appointments and reservations online because I didn’t have to talk to anyone. And when my phone rang, no matter who it was, spam or relative, I would freeze up.

Call in advance. Sometimes, I make a call with my mom. When I stop talking on the phone, I text or email the person and say, ‘when should we talk next week/month?’ It eases my mind to know the person I am calling expects me and has dedicated time to speak with me, and that can go both ways.

Write down something you want to remember. Here’s a tip straight from my 12-year-old, who tends to feels nervous ordering aloud at restaurants: She writes her order down, verbatim, to read aloud when the server asks. Write down your requirements when you are available, and make an appointment if you have to. When I was nervous I would forget anything, which is why I used to write my characters names down when I took calls.

Don’t be dishonest. I was honest with myself and the people I was talking to. I said that I was rusty on phone calls but wanted to make a concerted effort to be present and keep in touch. I found if I was willing to make the effort, they were often willing to do the same. It is the thing about talking on the phone. They can hear how much I meant it.